My family and I were snuggled tightly inside a friend’s pick-up truck. I was seated between my mother and this particular family friend, whom we where traveling hours away to help move.Throughout our road trip, they had been chatting away on a great many topics. During so,I sat patiently and listened, occasionally chiming in, yet unraveled I had not blossomed into any sort of center of attention.Then my chance arose as Mimi addressed my name. “Taylor,What is the capital of Maryland?” I had proudly learned and memorized every state and its capital previously in my studies and I blurted a response with innate sureness, “Boston”. I knew I was wrong instantly and I was desperate to get it right. “Well,” I said,” there’s Baltimore, Massachusetts …..” I tried again and again ,jinxed by laughter and embarrassment and doomed to another faulty answer. Meanwhile my brothers, who moments ago sat on the verge of irritation and discomfort smushed in the back seat, had become lively and vocal. My childish self was fuming beyond a blush, and by the time I retrieved the correct answer the entire car was enthusiastic with friendly yet humiliating laughter. I was absorbing my share of humble pie like a dried sponge suddenly quenched by some sum of water.
I fear the weaknesses of a faulty character, oblivious to ignorance, chastised with envy, preoccupied by doubt, held up by the scares of tragedy, and settling for all things materialistically great and self-important. I cringe to the spears of denial and their meaningless rant. I desperately attempt to rid my self of the fears of a faulty character, so complex and innate to our human nature. I feel designed for a greater endeavor then the loathing of a empty life of self-indulgences.
“Everyday we discover, observe, and set goals. In some profound way life moves us to action.We adventure through the beaten path of trial and error. The elements that define us bind and mend. We are heros and villains, doers and observers -through out our existence we create puzzle pieces of our own. “